I’ve had the privilege of travelling and working in Africa for 25 years; I’ve also been coaching for 25 years. When I started coaching initially in South Africa, Kenya, Ghana, Botswana, and Uganda there was serious talent, but not talent at scale. That was resolved many years ago – today, there is talent in abundance.
Africa’s challenge today is leadership. There are some truly brilliant leaders. But there is not leadership at scale yet. Therefore, we have taken it as our mission to do all we can to help grow leadership everywhere we visit in Africa.
After recently speaking in Boston USA, we were fortunate to receive many enquiries to speak in a variety of locations. One of these was both persistent and charming in equal measure. We received a personal and heartfelt request from the CEO of Stima Stacco, one of Africa’s largest and most successful credit unions. Dr Gamaliel Hassan was both excited and determined. He had got together with two fellow CEOs, Peter Njenga of KenGen and Joseph Siror of Kenya Power and they were determined to put on a Leadership Summit that would be a game changer in Nairobi.
It was both far too compelling and important to even think about saying no to the excitement and love shown by these special Kenyan companies. I was invited to give a leadership masterclass at the Leadership Game Changer summit, hosted by KenGen, Kenya Power and Stima Sacco Society LTD.
All the times I’ve been to Kenya, there have been three things that hit me straight away.
It’s one of the most welcoming places one earth, absolutely everybody welcomes you – even the immigration officials were friendly and helpful.
Kenyans have the most incredible work ethic – it’s in their blood – this nation works hard. It’s part of who they are, and the values they uphold.
The final thing, which I have been trying to challenge – they are so very self-effacing. They are so polite and modest. Their humble nature is admirable, but it can hold them back from self-confidence and stepping up. That has led me to both love them and gently challenge them every time I come.
One of the biggest myths that I encounter far too frequently when I coach across Africa, is that leaders are born. There is this common belief amongst far too many people in far too many places that leadership is bestowed upon the chosen few. Even more concerning, it’s always men and more specifically, it’s usually the big, charismatic, outspoken, men. This has troubled me for a long time. Consequently, I opened the conference with the strong provocative statement that leaders are definitely not born and can be made – but we believe leaders are found. This was seen to be more provocative than I would’ve thought, and a sea of phones were raised to take pictures of the slide.
I stood at the front of the auditorium and announced, ‘Everybody can be a leader if they want to be.’ For many of the women, it was elevating, necessary and comforting. A queue formed at the break; the phrase repeated to me was ‘I needed to hear that.’ It was a privilege to be part of something so necessary for so many people.
I love hearing and gathering remarkable stories, and we had them beautifully in abundance at this truly groundbreaking event.
There was an exciting and near tangible buzz in the large auditorium and we were all fuelled by the powerful engagement and endless goodwill and optimism.
It wouldn’t be a trip to the beautiful city of Nairobi if I didn’t come away with a bucket full of stories.
About 6 months ago – I received a beautiful LinkedIn message from a young woman called Sarah, from Nairobi. She was excited to share with me of her love and admiration for my latest book, SPIKE. I was blushing whilst reading her generous and insightful perspectives she had taken from Spike.
She bravely decided to make contact. We had a beautiful exchange. As life would have it, not too long later I was on my way to Nairobi. I dropped her a message, sharing the news and within an instant she let me know she’d do anything to make sure we met. We met first thing at the hotel we were staying at for coffee. She was flustered and worried about being a little late, we took a few moments whilst she recovered and settled down.
She was clearly a little nervous, but after a few reassuring minutes it was like we had known each other for ages. After her initial shyness and formality, she soon started responding openly and honestly with a wry sense of humour. She was in a tough spot as her recent contract had just finished and she was desperately looking for work. Her passion and side hustle were all to do with sweets. She had a gift for innovative confectionary and had a few commercial customers that she was still working hard on, but it was a start-up and required constant investment.
She pulled out her well-worn paperback copy of SPIKE, that she wanted me to sign for her. I had a pristine hardback copy for her – but she was adamant to have her original one signed.
As we were saying our goodbyes – I asked if she would attend the conference the following day – ‘I’d love to, but …,’ she replied – I insisted that she must. It was only after she had left, that I worked out and then realised she had no phone. She was contacting me using LinkedIn on her sister’s mobile. It then all came to me but far too late; she had walked for miles – just to come and see me. Not only that, but she’d also be walking to make her way to the conference. I had no way of getting hold of her.
One of my colleagues, Zak, saw her the next day at the conference – she was leaving the hotel. Zak recognised her and went over to her and was surprised to hear she was not being allowed into the conference without a ticket – he took her with him, got her registered and ensured she was part of the conference. I saw her later on and she thoroughly enjoyed every minute. She looked down when she shared with me that she was embarrassed at the fact she had no phone to contact me with.
We now spoke as friends. I soon learnt that she has desires to be a nurse – she had received an offer from Germany to be educated and trained for her dream. Now that we are back in London, we have helped Sarah with a new Smartphone, and we will do what we can to help her with her dream.
During the conference, we had a few breaks, it was the perfect time for me to connect, interact and hear stories from others in the room.
During one of these breaks a woman named Judith approached me, “Can I share something please?” she said in a determined fashion. Judith shared that she was initially reluctant to come to the event. It puzzled me, to be honest, I wanted to know why. Her face didn’t tell the story of someone not enjoying the event.
She continued, ‘far too often in Nairobi we invite big global speakers from USA who tend to be African American, and it makes me feel because they’re Black they’ll understand and appreciate our experience in Nairobi – what tends to happen instead, is seriously hard marketing prior to the event, speakers behaving like rock stars and not showing up until they need to, playing of someone else’s national anthem, and there’s next to no connection as they ‘broadcast’ a ‘well-oiled’ talk that has been given many times before. As soon as they finish – they’re escorted out the auditorium – before you know it, they’re gone, and so are the memories. She went on. She said, “Now you may call me cynical but ….”
I wondered where this was going.
She then said “I had a long trip to get here – so I got here at 6:45am in the auditorium, to my surprise you were already here, sitting alone at the front. I noticed you took the time to talk to everybody around you. Once introduced on to the stage, you walked on calmly with no great fanfare. The way you spoke, it was like you knew us forever. I am never going to forget that. I know you’re not from Nairobi, but it felt like you were.”
The MC did a really excellent job, opening proceedings, introducing everyone magnificently. At the break I had a chat with him. ‘Hey Frank, how are you doing?’ naturally came out of my mouth, but to Frank, it was a shock.
Frank shook my hand and had the friendliest grin you could imagine; his face was both filled with joy and surprise. We had a wonderful talk and grabbed a photo together. It wasn’t until afterwards did I realise why he was so startled throughout – he posted our picture on LinkedIn and tagged me – with gratitude and humility, Frank made it apparent that he never mentions his name when hosting, as he believes the events are never about him. So, for me to call him by his name both threw him and delighted him. It was a remarkable human touch that he won’t forget, and a touching affirmation for me.
These three special individuals taught me so much that I just had to share their stories with you.
It costs nothing for a candle to light another candle.
Wherever you go, whoever you meet, give them a chance and be kind. Create an environment where they can be who they want to be, and they will share with you who they really are, and you can do the same. Humility is appreciated by everyone and is the amazing sign of leadership.
We all come from unique backgrounds, we all have different dreams, and we all have a story to tell. That is what makes inclusion so special.
Thought of the week:
Put yourself in other people’s shoes – be the leader you’d want to follow.
Tips for becoming an A player:
Go the extra mile for those who deserve it
Be a voice for inclusion
Give others a reason to smile
Support gains trust
Be smart and choose to include
